Morphin at the Video Store: Mortal Kombat: The Journey Begins

Believe it or not, there was a time when any video game could get an animated series aimed at children. No, I'm not talking about some of the good ones, like Mega Man or Sonic SatAM. I mean... Mortal Kombat.

Yes, you read right. A franchise known for it's guts and gore got a kid's cartoon. It was called Mortal Kombat: Defenders of the Realm, and from what I've heard, it was a steaming pile. But, that's not what we're discussing today, oh no. Today we're discussing the animated abomination known as "Mortal Kombat: The Journey Begins." From what I can tell, it was a direct-to-VHS animated movie designed to promote the first live-action film and the third game. That's a good sign...

So the film opens with the New Line Cinema logo playing the theme we all know and love. Then we get narration, explaining the background behind the Mortal Kombat tournament. Yeah, as if anyone who bought the tape hasn't played the game. Keep in mind, at the time, the only people who were into Mortal Kombat at the time were gamers, and the movie wasn't even out yet.

We are then introduced to our three heroes, Liu Kang, everyone's favorite Bruce Lee clone, Johnny Cage, everyone's favorite Jean-Claude Van Damme clone, and Sonya Blade, who's also in this. Sonya is trying to work her walkie-talkie, while Johnny gets seasick. It turns out Sonya is looking for a wanted man, and she wants to talk to the captain of the boat. But she gets blocked by Sub-Zero. Then Shang Tsung comes out, and explains that Sonya has been chosen for the tournament. Shang Tsung then does some magic on Liu and Johnny, and Scorpion tries to hide from the fact that he's in this cartoon.

Sorry, Scorps. We can still see you.
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So Shang Tsung instructs Scorpion to kill Sub-Zero, who sneak attacks our heroes. Oh, if you haven't noticed from the screenshot above, the animation quality is terrible. Like, Hanna-Barbera levels of terrible. And of course, being marketed to kids, the fighting... has no blood. But the worst is yet to come.

Scorpion then fights our heroes, and the best part of this whole thing happens. Scorpion says his usual "GET OVER HERE!!!" as he activates his signature attack on Sonya. It all goes downhill from there. But then, Raiden intervenes. Shang Tsung and Raiden have an argument. Then Liu explains to Johnny what Outworld is, and we get a "not in my job description" joke from Johnny. Then we get a flashback to... BY THE ELDER GODS!!!

My eyes hurt already.
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As you can see, this travesty indulges in computer animation. And my God... I don't think Foodfight! looked this bad. Hell, even PS1 rendered cutscenes were better animated than this! And this was a major selling point for the tape. To give you an idea of how bad this looks, this tape came out a full year after Re-Boot, the first ever computer animated TV show. It was also released a full month before Toy Story, and that was the first ever computer animated feature-length film. I can only blame this on budget restrictions, but even that is too kind.

So we get our CGI fight scene and then our heroes arrive on the island. Then, no less than 20 seconds later, another CG fight scene, this time between Scorpion and Sub-Zero. Painful to look at and pointless in the long run, its only purpose is to explain why Scorpion is basically a ghost.

We get more exposition from Raiden, and we get a "conquer your fears" speech. Then, Kung Lao is mentioned and--ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?! ANOTHER CG FIGHT?! This time between Goro and... black Goro? I'm not even trying to be racist or funny, that's what he looks like.

So, after that--OH MY GOD, ANOTHER ONE!! This time, it's Kung Lao against Goro.

Afterwards, our heroes are attacked by Tatarkans. And this is where the worst of the budget limits shine through. Animation is reused to a degree that makes the Flintstones look like Walt Disney. After about 2 minutes of regurgitated cells, Raiden intervenes. Then Shang Tsung decides to start the tournament.

And it ends with our favorite theme playing over a clip show of the CG fights.

So, how was it? Forget Foodfight!, Elf Bowling, or any cartoon the '70s has produced, this is the worst animated thing I have ever seen. I shudder to think of the Mane Six's thoughts on this...

Twilight: This direct-to-video cartoon is simply a shameless attempt to cash in on Mortal Kombat's popularity and the then-upcoming movie. The writing and animation is abysmal, not to mention the voice acting.

Rarity: I must say, Sonya looks terrible in green.

Applejack: What in the name of Celestia have ah just witnessed?!

Rainbow Dash: This isn't Mortal Kombat... this is just a half-hour long movie commercial! And it's not even a good one! Shame on Ed Boon and John Tobias for allowing this atrocity to come into existence!

Pinkie Pie: So... much... nope...

Fluttershy: Oh... my...

FINAL VERDICT:

★☆☆☆☆

1/10 "Your soul is mine." -IGN​