"I'm not ganna date I'm not ganna date I'm not ganna date" Well everypony I'm ganna try to date. These this girl I like but idk if she likes me. Her friends keep asking me information and such, she tried to hug me, she's talking to me a lot more, she did a sexy pose in front of me (I was like "umm *tries not to stare at boobs(lol)*") and more... But she does that stuff with her friends but it's slightly different. I think I could handle it possibly but I'm not sure. Could anypony tell me 1-is she hinting 2-how to not get that awkward friend zone feeling if I'm denied and 3-How do I ask her!!!!Ive flirted since I was little but have asked out successfully little to none. I'm not hideous or anything. I really don't know why until now I've thought of asking out again other than the many rejections from middle school. Ugh I hate this... -foreveralonemane
Haha this, seriously just take the chance. Never once have I had a girlfriend, if I get one in the future cool if not cool. All I need are friends end of story.
I say just ask her straight up. In the words of the great Zebrahead. Rise up, you got nothing to lose. -- Sent from my Palm Pre using Forums
Everybody's pretty much right on the money, just go ask her, you have nothing to lose. Worst case scenario: She says no and you have an awkward week around her at most, but can use the experience to better your skills in the future.
oh this is something i almost mastered 1: don't overdo it instead of using the word "date" just ask if she would like to get some coffee or go see a movie (note this should be asked during a conversation) if she says no then this leaves you the option to try again later seance you didn't use the word "date" 2: if she says yes then treat it simply as if its just friends hanging out but keep the conversation simple with subtle hints now and then 3: after the event ask her if she would like to do this again as a date sometime (dont go over bored just say it like you was saying hello) 4: if she turns you down just shrug it off and move on, no use spelling milk about it
When you're having a good conversation, just casually say/ask, "Hey. Do you want to go out some time?" If she says no, just shrug it off and move on. You can't get stuck on rejection. You won't meet "the one" on your first try (except for a 1/1,000,000 chance) so try not to make her that. Love is an emotion that is built up over time and without instant results.
For starters, middle school isn't a good example. i asked out four girls in middle school, and got rejected all four times (though one of them went on to be my best friend, and still is). In high school, I've had ten girlfriends so far. What does that mean? Well, with time, people change, as do their environments. I have a little experience in the environment you've described, so I'll offer up what I have. I've lived only a little yet, but these are still points to take into account. 1. Every girl is different. There are no fullproof standards for what they mean when they say or do something. That said, people in general seem to send the same sort of signals; if you're having trouble deciphering the signals she's sending you, maybe you should let her know that using your own. 2. Life is fun when you take a few risks every now and again. Impulse dating might not always be a good idea, but that doesn't sound like what you're going through. Let her know you like her. Maybe she likes you, or maybe you can just be friends (that happens, you know). 3. The final point in this short list: do what makes you happy. If it would make you unhappy to remain quiet around a girl you have strong feelings for rather than express those feelings, your path forward is clear. Here's another fine tip I once received: when you get older, roses are lovely. Some girls really like them. Heck, if someone got me a bouquet of roses, I'd fall head-over-heels for them. That's probably because I'm a nature guy. And I've never had a girl give me flowers. *sigh*
Sounds like you have a lot of girl friends but not a lot of girlfriends. I'm assuming you're a young lad, Banjo, but don't ever ask a girl to lunch or coffee as a first date. That's instant-friend zone and they won't respect you. Before you know it, you're buying shampoo for them and helping them with homework and listening to them complain about their friends but you never get in their pants and then insist that it's because "they're not like that". Listen to me: The VERY, very first thing you should do, if you're interested in this girl, is ask her to dinner in a very confident and reassuring way. Your intentions will not be confused. Don't beat around the bush with this ****. Just ask her to dinner. Don't worry about her friends. Depending on how young you are, this girl may be head-over-heels impressed that you are this mature about this and not caught up with her friends' chatty-Kathy silliness. Also, if you grew up in the city like I did, go somewhere within walking distance so you don't have to take the subway. If the date goes well, dish out for a cab home. If you don't live in a city, drive if you have a car.
1: im 20 2: the partners i go for are never for sex if that were the case id be like my fratboy of a brother and turn to booze and partying (which i never do seance im very anti-alcohol) 3: the women i aim for are the ones with brains and a pretty face and if the only way i can reach them emotionly is threw a 30 dollar steak then there not for me 4: i never said going to lunch/coffee with them should be a date it should be a way to get to know them more then you do now
I agree with valor. I have naver once thought of going out with a girl with the reason to get in her pants. Not to mention that I'm straight edge and pan sexual(hopefully that's the right word) So the thought never crossed my mind. -- Sent from my Palm Pre using Forums
Valor, I'm not trying to be a d***, but, tell me, honestly, if you've ever thought these things, and I'm trying to level with you because I empathize with your situation and I think a lot of guys have felt the same way: - [this one is for you specifically] Why do you think sex is out of your league? - You think only guys who are d***s can get girls, and you lament about how girls only like guys who are d****s? - You set yourself apart by saying you want girls with brains, with class, with feelings, with blah blah blah, and then you defensively throw sex out of the picture? What makes you think that these types of girls don't want sex too? I think what really is going on is that you do want to have sex with these girls - albeit with a real, more substantial relationship - but you put a defensive mechanism to rationalize your lack of success in this field when you end up as the friends of the "girls with brains". The reality is, particularly among younger girls (of both the brainless and brained variety), is that they don't want guys who are d***s. What appears to you as a never ending succession of mean guys getting with girls is really that girls, more than anything, want guys who are confident. In the younger crowd, confident guys tend to be the jocks and other people who have flourished in a narrow and vapid social system. In my view, this is a prime arena for more substantial and otherwise courteous guys to take over, but the problem is, most guys who complain about this stuff are not successful not because they're not d***s. They're not successful because they're timid, they're boring, they make girls uncomfortable, and they don't take the initiative. On my very first proper date, when I was a junior in high school, I took a girl out to a Turkish restaurant, had a great time, and then went back to my apartment where nobody was home and hung out in my room watching television. I never made a move and I never went out with her again because she was mysteriously cold to me afterwards. Reflecting on that date, she gave me a lot of hooks but I was never the kind of guy before who would just "go for it" and you never realize how hard it is until you're in that situation and you truly have to change your mindset about it. Girls just want to have fun.
you do know i was talking about Women being out of league right? not sex if it leads to sex, it leads to sex so im not going to spend all my time with a girl for sex when i could use that time to build a long term relationship made to last. and it seems your entire speech's are all about you just saying how you think your the right about relationships when the truth be told there is no right formula, if your going to over analyze every little detail about the right way to ask someone out or to date them then your only making it harder for yourself to find the gal right for you
Sorry then. I think then someone who felt the same way wouldn't be complaining about girl problems, no? They would sort of be content with the fact that they're getting nowhere with girls. Otherwise, they wouldn't make a thread about how they wish they were better with girls and not "forever alone". ... Really? I don't understand what you mean. You mean to say that you think you are out of the league of most women, or that most women are out of your league? How many romantic, long-term relationships have you been in that did not involve sex? I have long-term relationships with girls that do not involve sex, but I call these girls my friends. True enough. I'm trying to give general enough advice that has worked for me and posit some other observations that I think are accurate about the dating situation. I don't claim to be an authority on it. Just what I know... giving my opinions... thought that was what this was about. If you want to stamp: "Manehattanite: Dating Guru" under my name then go right ahead. I'm not an expert by any means and I don't claim to be. There are plenty of things I would like to be better at, but are you really getting angry at me because you think I'm trying to be the "king of relationships" by saying some totally outlandish, unheard of things like "be more confident"? Golly.
Why does nearly EVERY thread with Mane end up as an argument? At least you're not complaining about there being no friendship or some such here =V, so I can't say I disapprove. In any case, I don't see where you got the whole sex thing from. Guy says he wants to start dating, and everyone jumps to assumptions. And yes, I do mean everyone in the above argument. I'd ask what he wants specifically, and give him advice on that. There is no answer in any case, true, but that doesn't mean you can't guide on the general line.
Oh I'm so sorry. I'm not the typical 20 year old male that wants to bang everything thar moves. I didn't start this thread. I'm just hear to offer what I can. I don't recall saying I had girl problems myself, sure it hasn't been the best for me. But oh well that's the past and this is now. Maybe some people like me see more in a person then something to have sex with. If I'm okay to spend time with a person, I want someone I can talk to, relate to, and all that other stuff you don't seem to care about. As for your final comment, yeah the thought never crossed my mind. I see no point in sex. Inb4- reproduction. -- Sent from my Palm Pre using Forums
Mane is speaking the unspoken, matter-of-fact truth. I think you should stop critiquing him and listen to him, because he's right. He practically stole the words out of my mouth... except I would have put it in more... Nice way.
I do assume that people date so they can have sex, the difference in degree being the immediacy of it. If that wasn't the point, I don't see why anyone would be worried about trying to have a casual, non-sexual relationship with someone and describe it as "girl problems".
