I've tried numeruos things, it helped a little but not 100%. Anyway I have to leave for school now anyways, bye
Heh, we all have our desires to go to fantasy places! I know I would do anything to meet fluttershy. As for work during the term, I know that feel. I'm constantly pressured to get so much work in each week. Don't turn up to 2 weekly labs for Psychology? Fail the paper... weekly assignments are worth 40% of the internal part of the papers I'm doing, thus making them an integral part, and seeing as I have 4 to do a week, it gets tiring. And then there's my mental state to look at... It gets overwhelming, but I'm managing somehow. Bronies seem to be helping I think.
Comrades, I need some help. After a day of reflection and chronic heartache, I am left with several choices of my next course of action in life. So, here is some quick background. For the entire year, I had been frequently tormented by the students at my town's supposedly best middle school. These twenty or so students caused me to hate not just school, but life itself. Time slowed, my life literally lost meaning. Most of this pain happened before I found FiM. Unlike most people, FiM did not solve my problems or make me happy. In fact, all it really did for me was give me a horrible, humiliating painkiller. Life goes on, time passes by. Life is back to the dull, horrid slowness. I have attempted suicide for the third time. People still torment me, making life even less appealing. I become an atheist, losing faith in the 'God' that refused to help me in these times. It comes to a point where I don't want to leave the house; where I stay at home and mindlessly type and delete text, managing information in my head as I shut out the world. Scars form on my arms where I cut and bite in anger and fear. Cowardice at its best. I could have stopped it. The people were short, scrawny, and all hat and no cattle. But one thing kept me from doing it. Every year- near the end- the band has a massive reward trip to Knott's Berry Farm. I was all set, practicing and waiting for the permission slip. It always arrived two months in advance. I got it. I read through it, skimmed it. I was happy, for a change. Hours later, I read through it in detail- and that's when I realized that those... people had ruined my year beyond repair. I didn't qualify due to my failing grades. Those people kept me from doing anything. They made sure I failed at least one class. So here I am, not qualified for the only thing that kept me from sweet revenge. So, comrades, what do you think? Mercy? Or revenge?
Fighting and lower yourself to their level means you lose even more. Do you want them to win more? I'm guessing no. I know life isn't always easy, but it gets better. It's really what you make it. Sure their words may hurt, but hurting yourself in rage doesn't solve anything, if anything it gives them more reason to continue. I was bullied in school. Only one pushed in enough to force me to fight (i mean fists, all fights beofre and after this were only throws and takedowns). This guy caused my to throw a punch. After this kid bullied me, he got full of himself. He tried bullying another guy. This guy was far less tame then me. He actually killed the bullying kid. I'm not saying it's right to kill, but bullies will get what theu deserve. -- Sent from my Palm Pre using Forums
Another one who thinks I'm just that stupid. I apologize for what it looks like. I do not know how to fist fight. I have no intention of learning any time soon. But it only takes a silent step and a well placed grab or hit to break a neck. I don't want to kill anyone, but just strangling the bastards for a few minutes would possibly damage their brains or severely frighten them. So believe me, I'm stupid, but I don't pretend I can beat someone up. Even if I am nearly double their size.
I never called you stupid. If you thought I did, I'm sorry. I'm saying the bullies will get what they deserve. Wheater it be a taste of their own medicine or they man up and apolgize. Then it's up to you on how you handle it. -- Sent from my Palm Pre using Forums
You didn't call me stupid, and I did give the impression I'm a brutish idiot who thinks he can take on the world. I'm just putting it out there I avoid direct contact, and know not to push my limits on something so important. Now that I think of it, I could have those... is people appropriate? I could have those savages arrested for what they did to me. But what's the fun in that? Although I have one more question. Is being merciful completely moral in this situation? As far as I can see, it isn't for me.
As I said before, I don't think going to their level will solve anything. Bringing it to the cops or principal is a better idea to me. When you ask about being merciful, to me it sounds like to want to confront them on a physical level. It's just me, but I seriously don't think you should do that. -- Sent from my Palm Pre using Forums
Sigh... It's easy to talk about, but when I think about it, I don't think I could do it. So I guess they win.
Aight first thing: Its brave of you talking here about that. Really. Second i dont have much time, so i have to cut it short, but ill be here in the afternoon again. Well you seem to have lots of Problems. Just like me you failed your only goal in life due to some ****heads who are nothing less but a footnote in your life from now on. That is how i handled things back then, i said to myself :"Not im not giving up, and im tooo precious to get my hands dirty on you, I'll be sucessful, even if i try thousands of times. and you'll be the ones who take out MY trash, and who repair MY Big-as-f**k Car. And that day I will be the one tormrnting you, because you never accoplished anything." And thats how it is. most of them have lost their path and are deep into drugs, or are unemployed and just waiting for death to come upon them, few of them have (very unthankful) Jobs. I'm soon going to be the one kicking their ***. Judging from the fact that you're in Middle School you must be young. Too young to give up. Dont do them a favor and keep sobbing and complaining about their hatred. Be proud of what you are, i had to learn it the hard way, that this is always better. I'm not the old yet, but i think with 22 years i have some life experience to share and most of this life experience says, that its better to Live your life head on. If you want to talk about this matter a bit more, ill be back this evening.
And that's another thing. I have found myself trying everything. These are not your average "give me ur lunch money lol" bullies, they operate in tightly knit gangs. I've listened to them when they think they're alone. It's amazing. Everything is planned days ahead. In fact, I reported a fight before it happened because I overheard it. The people I heard it from were never seen around them again. This isn't one lil' white boy following me at lunch, these are pre-established ambushes involving up to eight people at a time. And they get away with it. And for the love of... do NOT call me brave. I am a coward, that is that. Do not lie to me. And once again, I find myself defying the smartest man of all time. "People these days think deeply. Only when people think clearly will progress be made." -Nikola Tesla
For your earlier post. They don't win unless you let the them win. You don't have to be like them to win. Bullies usually never do anything alone. They have number so they feel safe. As for my bullies the smallest number at anytime was 3. They weren't the lunch money type either. They were more the physical harm kind. I really do wish you the best with them. I still say telling the principal is best solution. -- Sent from my Palm Pre using Forums
They fancy pain, they don't care what effect it has. None of them seem to feel anything either. So I guess they already won. Teachers don't do anything about it. I can't do anything about it. I spent the entire year looking forward to this and now I'm going to miss it. I am so unbelievably angry, but at the same time shockingly calm. All that aside, I think I'll sleep on what to do. They, unlike most people, don't need an instant response. They keep messing until they get one, no matter what the cost. And that is why I hate them with everything I have. But alas, I cannot kill. Too brave. The coward does not kill. And like they always say, suicide is the coward's way out. One of these days...
Anybody here yet. I'm so freaking tired. Only 1 hour 30 minutes to go until I get home. I got a friend request, shame I can't accept it till I get home. -- Sent from my Palm Pre using Forums
It is really sad to read all that story... Life is hard sometimes and one will always find rocks on his/wer way. If you can't face up that horrible situation, ask for some help. Obviously the right people ready to help @Pixxxx!!!! I'm here to amuse you while you're at work
Hi Rain. Chances are pretty high for me streaming this morning. Now I just have to decide on what to draw. -- Sent from my Palm Pre using Forums
Cool!!! Think about it calmly. I liked you last drawing, the only fault (it is not really a fault because it is a decent picture) was the hollow of the ear. But as you said, it is a matter of practice. I'm trying to draw crows
I was working on a leafeon picture, but I don't want to bore people with me trying to draw paws for 2 hours. I might start on that terror picture. -- Sent from my Palm Pre using Forums
