Gender Inequality Pertaining to Domestic Violence and Self Defence.

If you hit me, I will not hold back, man or woman.

Nobody has the right to hit anyone; if an altercation occurs with no hope of peaceful resolution, it's going down, regardless if you've got lady parts or not.

The whole double standard 'omg guy hit girl' scenario is so outdated. There are many physically and emotionally abusive females out there. Almost as much as there are males, in my experience.

I'd never hit anyone without extreme provocation... 99% of the time, that's if they hit me first. (For no good reason. If I'm drunk or something I'd hope I have the capacity to not hit back regardless.)

 

Hmm, I don't know what I'd do If a girl hit me. I doubt I'd hit back because I'd be questioning myself on whether that was the right thing to do. I'd probably shove her away and hope she keeps her distance. Whether Guy hits Girls or the reverse, It should be the same punishment for both sexes. Im sure if a case goes to court then that will be the outcome but It's the ones who are too scared or frankly wont go down that road that are going to be neglected and hurt more. I guess we need to put more programs in place for victims of both sexes where they can go and get help with their situation.

 

Yeah this double standard always bothered me. I mean, I understand the reasoning behind it. I can punch harder than most women of average physique because I'm pretty strong. But when it comes down to it, that doesn't really matter in a confrontation. It doesn't matter if you're physically stronger or weaker, if you pick a fight, you'd better be prepared for the consequences. Having said that, I avoid confrontation at all costs, so even though I am pretty strong, I despise fighting and would prefer to simply walk away. Thankfully, my hand has almost never been forced.

 

Double standards huh? Hello life, how are you?


The world is pretty much nothing but double standards and inequality. Better get used to it. That said, these are my thoughts:

The reason that domestic violence cases where the female is the aggressor are so underrepresented is because what man wants to let his friends, family and the whole damn neighborhood know he's being beaten up by a girl? Men have pride, but more than that there's a ridiculous amount of societal pressure put on men to be, well...men. And men don't get their asses kicked by little girls. Is it unfair? Yes, but life isn't fair. I'm not saying it's right or even that I agree with it, but that's the way things are.

Point number two... I would never hit a girl. Period. Even if she's attempting to use me as a punching bag, I still wouldn't do it, partly because of how I was raised but mostly because of my own principles.
Speaking of, I have gotten socked in the face by a girl before, and she was far more farm girl than girly girl, so it was a pretty solid right cross. But, she was a friend who was drunk and in a fair amount of emotional distress at the time, so I never held it against her. Barely even made me flinch lol. But even if she wasn't a friend and she meant to do it, I still wouldn't have hit her back.

I also get hit in my MMA class fairly regularly so getting punched (guy or girl) doesn't bother me too much lol.

 

The world isn't fair, and it never will be. And you cannot change that, because you cannot change other people. However, it is entirely possible to change yourself.

As for why I wouldn't hit a girl? Because chivalry isn't dead, at least not for me.

 

I got attacked by a girl who was high on meth during my senior year.
Despite the fact that she went after me without provocation, and with the intent to cause harm, there were still a few people who got mad at me for defending myself.
Apparently, because she was female, I was supposed to just stand there and take it.

 

If you provoke me enough, I WILL fight back. Period. Man, woman, dog, giant robot pirate chicken. I don't care. If a woman's gonna try to hit me like aman then I'm fully willing to fight her like a man. Now, I wouldn't kill her or even seriously injure her... Just teach her a lesson. Is treat a guy the exact same way because if I fully go at them then I expect they'd do the same thing.

 

Would I defend myself if someone attacked me? Maybe. I might also run away, but if I couldn't run then yes, I might fight.

If this "someone" is a girl, it makes little difference to me. I think it might be less respectful, actually, to not treat a fully developed and non-impaired woman as not being on the same physical level as her male counterparts, than it would be to take their challenge seriously and respond in an effort to end the violence.

My girlfriend once asked me, "If I was stronger than you, would that bother you?"

I responded, "No. I value other kinds of strength in people."

Well, I would argue that the very concept of fairness shouldn't be applied to the world in general. The world is neither fair nor unfair; the world is not a mind which understands the circumstances of its inhabitants and chooses to act based on its understanding, it merely exists. I know that's not exactly what you meant, but I thought I would throw it out there as a food-for-thought kind of thing. Still, you definitely have the right not to defend yourself if that is what you want.

 

Mind. Blown. haha

Nah that's not really how I meant it, but I get what you're saying too. But, no matter which way you look at it, life is very often unfair and trying to change that (while very noble) is going to be a battle of attrition, if not futility.


As far as myself goes, I do choose to never hit back. Although, that's not entirely accurate. I do hit girls on occasion, but that's in my MMA class lol, so it's a bit different.

 

Not offended at all, everyone has their own way of seeing things. I realize that chivalry is quite an old-fashioned thing and that some people might consider it sexism, even if it's "good" sexism. But remember, chivalry is alot more than just treating women with respect, it's a whole code of conduct for how you treat everybody and stuff....

But, there's slightly more to my reasons than just that. Mostly due to legal ramifications. No matter who started it, who do you think a jury would probably side with if a 215lb, large, muscular male who is trained to fight decked a 120lb female? Not to mention that everyone I came across would probably treat me like a scumbag for doing it. So...there's that.


I think I'd rather take a few punches to the face than deal with that suck salad.

 

That's definitely different, haha.

Thanks! :derpe:

 

What's up wit' dat? Double standards is what's up wit' dat.

I don't think the people who are anti-violence against women, but indifferent or ignorant towards violence against men, quite grasp how sexist they are in both directions. While it is true that sexual dimorphism dictates that men typically have anywhere from 20-30% more upper body strength than women, this does not justify the assumption that all women are predisposed to be victims, and that no woman can be "strong enough" to inflict any significant measure of damage upon a man. Such thinking kind of spits in the face of the women who share the field of battle with our military men, but I digress.

The simple fact of the matter is that society at large still views women as weak and easily victimizable, leading to a generally heavier publicization of male-on-female domestic abuse. And where one side is publicized, the other is often downplayed. But female-on-male domestic abuse goes far beyond a lack of media coverage; going back to sexist double standards, it is assumed not only that a woman is physically incapable of significantly harming a man, but also that men should just "man up and take it" - per traditional views of manhood, any man who goes to the authorities over being battered by his woman is a pitiful excuse for a man. Cops are all ears when a woman is reporting abuse, but when a man goes downtown to file a report and gets laughed at? Kinda makes you not want to say anything at all, which kind of sheds some serious light on the reason so many instances of female-on-male abuse go unreported.

Same thing applies to sexual harassment, now that I think about it. Perhaps it doesn't make me seem too credible to use Family Guy as an argument, but did anyone see the episode where Peter gets sexually harassed by his boss, only to be told by his own wife that "men can't get sexually harassed"? Because, hey, aren't men all randy pigs who enjoy all sexual contact, wanted or unwanted? BS. I've heard testimonies of men who've gotten groped by women in lax work environments, and the reaction from everyone else is always amusement. And when these guys express discomfort, the universal reaction is "what're you, GAY or something?" [As if being gay were somehow a bad thing, but again, I digress.] If ever there were a shining example of men's issues not being taken seriously, it's incidents like these.

Anyway, I really wish I could share a YouTube video on the subject I saw a few years back, but I don't remember what it was called. Basically a social experiment involving staged instances of male-on-female/female-on-male abuse at a public park. As suspected, the m/f abuse garnered outraged reactions and multiple calls to the police from bystanders. The f/m abuse garnered only confused glances, a sickening display of glee from one woman, and only ONE call to the police by a concerned woman.

As for my personal beliefs about hitting women in self-defense, I'm conflicted. In an egalitarian society where men and women would be on equal footing in all aspects of life, self-defense would be legally justified regardless of the attacker's sex/gender/sexual orientation/age/race/ethnicity/class/etc., and if we lived in such a society, I'd be all for it. But considering the society we live in now treats men hitting women for any reason as, like, teh wrst tihng EVAR, I would do my very best to restrain myself in the face of a female attacker. Justified or not, it's not worth the legal entanglements.

 

On Trisha, Boys as young as 14 were sleeping with women much older than them, and instead of saying it was pedophilia they don't put those women that did it in jail. If it was a girl going out to meet older men, they would treat it as pedophilia and have them locked up. Double standads. Little boys need protecting too, and we also need to BREAK THESE DAMN GENDER STEREOTYPES.

Also, Watch this, skip to the end if you want. http://www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&rc...09Bk45Wr0OPxj1OBi8d3Frw&bvm=bv.61725948,d.ZGU This man has been put away and done time for a crime that he didn't commit, and it was easy for that woman to manipulate the situation to her favour by saying she was raped. That man was innocent and he couldn't work, had to sign on every week and worst of all her daughter was initially led to believe that he was a monster.

This has happened so much, and still happens, and quite often I've been ashamed of being part of the female gender as a result.

 

I believe the answer here is be prepared for what people are capable of humans do crazy stuff. Be aware of the situation and work around it. Its sad to say but there may be few people in this world you can trust. I have female friends that I have know for years that I wouldn't be left alone in their rooms with them for it may lead to trouble for me.