As if...

So I got a new so called; "Borrowed Laptop.." (Don't worry I didn't steal it..) My school classes lets us use them for personal things..sometimes.. So now I need to save up for a new laptop,then camera. As I am in photography, and I absolutely love it! Many things have been meddling in my life lately.. I have tried suicide more than once, and now figured it is best to resolve this issues straight on! Many people in the classes I take cut themselves, which makes me paranoid about how the outcome will change..I have also recently got out of a relationship, I really did like him, I just think I never took this relationship between us seriously. Huh, I wish I could go back in time and reverse everything! If you could begin to imagine how your friends enjoy cutting through layers of skin for; "pleasure" they're mentally insane, take it form me. I have many issues/conflict I try to deal with everyday. It will never change, I honestly have no real friends. I think of myself as a NEET someone who spends there life indoors, doing nothing socially. I have looked upon myself as a useless human being. Hopefully gaining more respect for myself than how others think of me..

Maybe I will do more blog entries.. well for now, see ya~!