You'll need a religious item, such a cross, a wicker basket, twelve eggs, six candles, and a jar of salt. At midnight, light six candles around a wicker basket of one dozen eggs. The basket has to be wicker, or the ritual won't work. After the candles are lit, you need to make sure you're carrying your cross, or whatever item you chose, with you as your pour a circle of salt around the candles. This is for your protection. You'll want to then sit down, and make another circle around where you are sitting. When all of this is said and done, take one of the eggs and throw it at your ceiling above you. If you've done everything right, the egg lord, God Emperor Humpty, will appear to you, hovering over your dozen eggs. You will likely be too shocked to speak at first, so he will initiate conversation with a greeting. Politely offer to challenge him to a game of twenty questions. He will gladly accept, for if he wins, he gets to take your soul to egg purgatory, but if you win... you become an eggceptional member of EP. Do not cheat during the game. He will take this as an insult, and kill you on the spot. Smart phone in your pocket at all times. Do not insult him, or treat him with anything other than the upmost respect. When all is said and done, if you win, say goodbye, and snuff the candles with your fingers. Do not blow them out. You'll want to keep the religious item with you while you sleep. And you'll wake up to find yourself beaming with eggcellence.
