I bid you greetings and salutations from the magical, whimsical world of Humania. The name is Murtaugh, but you may call me Squinky. I like long walks on the beaches, and strawberries and peaches. I'm hot-wired, voice activated, full of protein, and bio-degradable. I’m interactive, I’m hyperactive and from time to time I’m radioactive. I'm behind the eight ball, ahead of the curve, riding the wave, dodging the bullet and pushing the envelope. I value purity, power, and humanity. My bestest friend is a faithful hound by the name of Quita. I see the snooge when we're apart, and believe love is only in your mind and not your heart. You needn't worry about me. I stopped listening to the voices months ago. I'm quite an ordinary man, and incidentally, I'm a human. I'm the most humanly human you'll ever meet. I am both intrigued and fascinated by Equestria's magnificent autocratic utopia, and its benevolent dictator. I wish to study Equestrian civics, and the magic of friendship, hopefully enabling me to harness its power for personal gain the betterment of mankind! But don't mind me. I will continue to observe and shall report my findings to my superior. And remember kids, Kitsuné are sadistic, viscous, soul-devouring monsters who, despite what the Japanese government tells you, should never be approached.
