So. It all started when I tried helping Simon with a little problem and ended up in telling him, some ponies and a forum from my country about some parts of my life and some lessons I learned to help them. Now, I'm going to do the same here! Yays! NOW. I didn't really care when my parents got separated. Well, otherwise I would have been traumatized to the day. Aside from that, from my 4 to around 13 years old I was always picked up by the other children. While every one was the ruthless and sadic type, it seemed I was the only innocent and pure type. Yeah. And the things got worse year by year. Each year something was taken from me, usually by mom, and usually she didn't want to, but she was forced to. First it were only some luxuries, but suddenly I realized I was cleaning all the damn house everyday along my sister. That was a bit harsh and time taking... And I can't give away time like that, specially now. Also, I have always been a... Lovely boy. Also a lover one. Always wanted to have a girlfriend. The girls were propably worse than the boys. Ah yes! About time... I had to move away from where I lived my whole life, and far from my school (which is irreplaceable. It is a very good public school, one of the best in my city and in the country). Now I have to take two bus's to go and two to return... That is, aside from the fact that there are days my lessons begin at 7:00 (I have to wake up at 5:30, and it actually always happens) and ends at 15:00. Some days they end at 17:10. My mother also said she cannot give me money to buy lunch at the school's bar/restaurant/thing, so I'll either have to bring home (which is not a very good thing, specially when you find inspiration in your food) or go back to teach private math lessons and use 90% of that money to the awesome lunch that is served in my school. And with the math lessons, I would get (did not start them yet, having some problems) at home around 18:30 or 19:00. Which leads me to something else... I want to stay fit. The 1st month I was moving in (still am) I did not a single exercise. I feel frustrated about that and just returned to the jiu jitsu, and I must say, the 1st day sucked. After the 1st round I was pale and my body was shaking... Couldn't I do it? Couldn't I survive it? Besides, it is 1 km away from my house, and I gotta walk to it... Guess what, more time lost. Time I could use for a bit itch fun time, or my career, which is writing. I haven't touched my netbook (where I am writing my 2nd book) about 2 weeks now, and I lost a document I needed to mail my 1st to be published. Now its going to be delayed... If I could get it published, half... No, even more of my problems would just vanish. Which is why I'm desperate right now about it. Or kind of. You'll see later. You know the better part? I'm in the last year. There's so much pressure about college, and the goddamn extra afternoon lessons I already told you about... Geez. BUT I don' care. I couldn't care less. There are some moments I lose my focus, but 99% of the times, I just do not care! One year ago I entered something called... PUA. Something of you may know about it, some of you may not. It does not matter. It helped in everyway EXCEPT what it proposed. But maybe it was better that way. I've discovered that everything is relative, that life is an absurd, and it is inside this deep **** that I'm living, and I gotta make the most out of it. That there are but two type of people: The ones that know that they're awesome and the ones that do not. That there's no good or evil (they're human creations. Also sorry for this one part here Simon. Just stating my beliefs :derpe, and that we and everything around is naturally perfect and meant to be! Nothing can change my mood or make me do something I don't want to. I cannot be forced, or changed. I cannot be beaten. I cannot die in awe. And I won't. Even though that with the maturity I believe I won I could have learned these lessons, life decided that I should learn the hard way. So every year, life throws something at me, punches me, kicks me, and try to make curl up in pain, fear, sadness and despair. But instead I stand up and shout back "Is that all that you got?" And everyday I'm harder, and better. That all this **** I'm going through is a training, a storm, a war... I shall pass it, I shall survive it, I shall fight in it and win it; and that everything will always get better at the end somehow. If it does not end well, that means it is up to me to make it end well. And I will. Aside from everything I already said, something that makes it easier for me to endure is this: enjoy the moment you're living right now. If there's not any aspect of it that is enjoyable, create one. For example: 05:30 or 6:30 "Man, this is such an awesome music" (Alarm or at the bus) 07:30 "This lesson is cool" (at school) 07:50 "Sleepy time is so great" (try not to do this one in particular) 10:00 "This chocolat is SOOO tasty" (a little luxury. There's a guy that sells a very good bon bon for a really low price. I always try to purchase it when I can, it lighten up my day.) 13:00 "Lunch time!" 14:00 Same as 2nd and 3rd 17:30 Same as 1st 19:00 "My Little Pony/Naruto/Amnesia/Counter Strike/League of Legends!/insertotherexampleshere/! Yay!" 21:00 "I am getting fit... YES!" 23:00 Same as 19:00 00:00 "Time to sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep yay" And so it goes. (Ah yes, as you can see from my routine, I won't have as much as time to visit here. But I'll try and always be here, so don't worry about that. I'll try to make up for it in the LOVELY weekends. That should totally be 3 days long.) Infortunaly, I only discovered MLP after that, so after that I got a LOT better from what I was before (or at least made me discover this side of mine). But I believe that it would bring that side up anyway, for the nature of the show and all the awesomeness we know about it. I wanted to be more direct, more short, with a bit more of... Sense. But I couldn't, sorry :derpe: If at least one person gets inspired with this, it will be enough. Thank you all for being such great folk and inspiring me further as well. And a fitting end to this thread... As Pinkie Pie would say: Cause I love to make you smile, smile, smile, yes I do! it fills my heart with sunshine all the while, yes it does! 'cause all I really need's a smile, smile, smile from these happy friends of mine
Life gets harder as we get older but we do become stronger. Nice to hear that you're optimistic about yours.
For some, it gets easier. As well for some, earlier life can be significantly harsher than later life quite easily.
Wow I read some of that all over again XD. I probably shouldn't have because of all the stuff need to do. but it has inspired me to work hard and push through all this hell that I'm going through. Like you Faon I am also finding myself wanting a girlfriend but my parents probably won't allow it and I'm worried about my marks. and if you're curious this is all the stuff I need to do. View attachment 3364 Which is why I need to go and get started now...my break is over.
I remember when my parents split up to, I cared and I hated it, it took time for me to realise that it was one of the best tradeoffs of my life, I gave up family to be the strongest person in mind and character. I wouldn't change that past ever, I've come too far and done too much to want the past to be different, it just makes me wonder if I would be half the person I am now..?
