Granted. They're REALLY horrid at it, though. I wish for the next user not to corrupt this wish in any way, and i also wish for him not to use "Granted."
Your wish is my command. Your wish stays pristine and incorruptibly for eternity. I wish for the next poster to get tazer'd in the face!
Granted. They aren't quite as vegetarian as we assumed and they eat us. I wish for an orbital anti hate beam!
Granted! Good luck trying to open the cellar door. I wish for more time... I'm starting to run out of it.
Granted. Your wish has been corrupted (Whatever you have wished for). I wish for... let's see... a better PC?
Granted. You stole Bill Gate's pimped out PC and now he has a personal vendetta against you! I wish for a squid in my freezer!
Granted. Through shipping (get it?) you get the harpoon but no gun. Seriously, wtf is wrong with shipping sometimes? I wish for a leg.
Granted, one table leg, no table, it also will never fit any table you have. I wish for the sqrt of pi