I can kind of relate. Just last year I went through an intense emotional period in my life... Sort of. I guess you could say the opposite actually seeing as how I felt like an emotionless shell most of the time just drifting throughout life. It actually really reminded me of the autopilot feature from click at the time. It's kind of hard to explain since I don't remember much of it. Though however I'm past all of that, I'm in a healthy mental state now that I finally know what I want to do with my life. Maybe the same might work for you if you haven't already found out?
Emotional death is just like any other kind. The things we call dead have yet to have a chance to be born.
I don't know that I'm seriously depressed. I'm just having an off day, and it's a chance to blow off steam and express thoughts I've kept inside for years because of their volatile nature. If anything, it's a relief to be able to share my negative feelings and not be looked at with pity or scorn or a "suck it up and move on" attitude. I admit I do occasionally get depressed. Not for too long, usually a day or two at a time, but they're doozies. I am being completely, 100% serious when I say My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic completely turned my life around. It taught (well, re-taught) me positive lessons that society and my own corrosive negativity had long made me forget. it showed me what things could be like with true friendship and harmony. Now I can face each day feeling I can do something to make my world a little bit happier, even if that little bit is just me. And I've borne witness to my newfound positivty rubbing off on some others, even if just a little bit, and that gives me hope for the possibilities of the future. It's a double-edged sword, though. It makes off days like today feel worse because part of me thinks I should be beyond that, though, of course, I know NOBODY is ever beyond that.
Maybe the same might work? I'm afraid I don't follow. I might just be tired and be missing something, but worked for you? I honestly don't know what I want to do with my life, and I'm almost 25. I'd like to be a singer, but I have issues of confidence with my voice. And I've never created any music, only imitated. I have no idea how to write.
> No one can be above that. Maybe I'm lucky. Maybe my time from when I did (and still do) meditation is paying off. In either case, I find it hard NOT to be in an euphoric state.
Well, that could be your place to start. You should totally get into singing, and this is the perfect community to test it out in. You'll get mostly positive feedback and the only critique you'll recieve will be to help you. Go ahead and give it a shot
Actually, I have already started with that. The link to the topic is in my sig. Few people give any kind of feedback though.
The funny thing is, when I started this whole brony thing, my life was over. My friend had told me I was no longer anyone anyone should be with, and the whole world turned against me. As I lay, despaired, on my bed, I remembered a request from a good friend of mine before we were separated. "Look up 'MLP Friendship is magic on youtube and watch it. It'll be worth your while" I had ignored him shortly after seeing the thumbnail, and then, two months later, there I was. So I watched it, laughed, and decided to see the next one. At this point, I was like "no matter how good it is, stop at episode 2" And then I watched the entirety of season 1. Whoops. And because of which, I learned something that, sadly, a lot of people don't realize. That being nice feels better than being mean. That standing up doesn't mean looking down at people. So then I slayed the Jabberwocky and went off to save Narnia, or something like that. However, I didn't ever think about what I had actually learned. I felt that even if I watched the show, I best not 'learn' anything. That's too far. But alas, here I am, preaching about love while all I do is hate. Perhaps I should just start giving chances. Sadly, that time is now gone. Everyone at school knows and hates me (except for a select few), so even if I want to help people, they won't let me. Sigh...
Well, on those depressed days, I am often visited by fantasies of suicide. So It's not a typical off-day. Not to say I'm like that today! Finally being able to say all this (perhaps too much?) has helped me immensely and I'm smiling again. Thank you all for listening. I know it must be unpleasant to read my downer posts. I want you to know I love you all for being accepting! *hugs ALL THE FRIENDS*
Sorry, I guess I came off a little harsh. I didn't have the right to say that you weren't having trouble, even if it is to a lesser extent to mine. I let out in here only a small portion. there are some things I want to let go, and I know you guys won't really mind, but some things I think just need to be kept to myself (not saying its derogatory towards anyone or anything). Plus I don't really like drawing attention to myself with my problems, I just want people to understand what I go through, so to understand what I do, and why.
You'd be surprised actually, plenty of us take great joy in taking time out of our schedule to listen to the ailments of those whom we know. Just getting things off of their chest can make someone feel completely better and in turn plenty of us love seeing the positive change. We're happy to listen :3
It's okay Xan. I took no offense whatsoever. I just wanted to clarify. I understand. Or maybe I don't. And that's okay too. We still love you regardless!
Thats a relief :3 Thanks By all means, If you have questions, I will be more than happy to answer Its just I don't like going off and saying "HEY LOOK GUYS! I'M A MENTAL WRECK! PAY ATTENTION TO ME!" but those who are interested in what I'm going through I commend
Anyway, now that this is resolved, or close enough anyway, I'll be heading off to bed. I've got an alarm to wake up to in 2 hours. Then another 3 hours after that. I dont know why I sleep like this, but it makes me feel like I've slept a lot more than I really have. Plus it's incredibly satisfying to forget about having 2 alarms, waking up to the first one possed that I have to get up already, and then remember it as I dive back into my pillows in joy.
As well as having a library full of creepy and disturbing images, I also have some ones that may cheer some people up. Even if some are black humour
