I found out recently that the circumstances of my birth were a very near thing. My parents' 4th child was born in 1978. At some point between then and 1983--I never asked them for the date--they decided to have a 5th child, at which point they most likely would've stopped. That particular attempt was halted by a miscarriage. Eventually they tried again, I was born in 1984, and the rest is history. I'm thankful they had me, of course. Still, the fact that if it weren't for that miscarriage I would never have existed... ...it's sobering to think about.
I know I haven't been active lately but I wish to share this. I have finally figured myself out to a degree and I am accepting all the good and bad in my past. Sheading my fears and worry of my past. Living for me today~ The reason I came to this is because I have been spending 2020 meditating on myself. Seeking answers and I think I finally got what I need. I have decided that My past, My fear, my hate, my desire to dwell on all that's transpired must not hold me. I am sheading the old me, sheading the insecurities, sheading my ties to things that only have left harm in my life. I don't fear death. I don't fear this pandemic. I don't fear the coming storm. I will still wear a mask, and I will still keep to myself IRL, mostly. But I am going to be living as I wish. If I get sick, I get sick. There is nothing for it. But point being I have been happier since I stopped worrying and stopped holding on to *squee!*. This has been a shift for me spiritually too. Thus some of the changes.
That explains the shift from shape-shifting bug to super-hungry bio-android. I have to admit, that's a good pick for an avatar.
Honestly, Majin Android 21 is more a figurative representation of my spiritual change. At least the closest representation. But thanks~ I like the avi change too~
Honestly though it's so surreal to me that I have been on this forum for 7 years now. (Literally a few days ago was the 7-year anniversary. Woo!) Looking back on everything, I've began realizing more and more each day how much this place impacted me more than I thought. Not in a bad way, of course. (Despite any of the dramas that have happened here, but I believe that's pretty common on a lot of forums anyway.) It's a shame I lost contact with a few of the friends that I met here and couldn't reach out to them. I don't know if sending a PM on here would do much since they're not around anymore. But at least I am still in contact with a fair handful amount of people outside of this site that I met during my time here. So I'm very grateful for that, even if we do not talk regularly. What mostly matters to me is they're still around. Another thing that's been on my mind is, I've been wanting to change my appearance on this site. (i.e. my avatar, username, etc.) I have gotten so accustomed to my current look and feel weird changing anything. I have been using this name since I first joined and back when I used to watch the show and be in the fandom, so it was sort of like a part of me. (Also the fact I was only a teenager when I registered so I didn't really think twice about setting up my profile.) So I'm pretty much debating on modifying some things and worried that people will not recognize me, maybe even treat me differently. Like I stated previously, been using this same look since the beginning so it does seem odd on making adjustments and all. Anyways, I'm pretty much rambling by this point and been typing this up for almost 40 minutes now. I'll just leave it to that.
I understand and yeah. Changing can be scary, but if it's a change that makes you happy, then don't avoid it. As you will hurt yourself so much more by trying to conceal it. But also be comfy with idea of the change. Never force something you do not want. My changes here were a long time coming, but I have reached a point where it was comfy for me to recently.
Agreed, if others don't seem to like it, then that's okay. What matters to me it's something that makes me happy. I shouldn't let others bring me down based on what's best for myself. I almost forgot to mention this in my previous post, I've been thinking about it for a couple years, and hopefully that time will come when I feel comfortable and confident enough.
Kudos to you. Always make sure to take care of yourself. You deserve it. Never let anyone convince you otherwise. *is mesmerized by swaying tail*
Hrm, I see there was a bit of activity back in 2019. Makes me wonder what happened to everypony's userbase. Could the show's end really dilute the interest on the community around here? That brings me to question yet another thing. What would be the point to create more fan content if the fandom itself is merely a memory?
I really don't have a answer for why things ended up as they did. Lack of interest, weariness with the show, or they got what they wanted out 0f the fandom. Who knows. But I know that the community isn't dead. And a reason to continue to make content is because of the dedicated fans that that stayed through thick and thin. That hold the same dedication as the creators. And to quote something that holds true; "Fandoms have a strange habbit of surviving". Even if that passion is not there like it use to be, all it takes is something massive to rekindle that spark. G5 holds the potental to do that.
The fact that forums like this are still up and running is testament to that. I'll admit, not once in the beginning did I think the MLP fandom would be alive and well going into the 2020's. It's really amazing. Feels like just yesterday I was listening to Everypony radio and browsing Equestria Daily. Crazy to think that was 10 years ago. Was in middle school then, about to finish up undergrad now. I've changed a lot, and so has the Fandom. But I think it's as strong as ever.
I see. You guys are right. I guess it just got to me to see the ashes of the game dev communities. Feels kinda lonely and honestly composing music and drawing feels like being sort of a phony. Ha, and come to think about it, I always thought the show was about to die by season 4. Not glad it didn't, though season 7 was my fave. But with the lack of direction and the expected high goal being reached early on, it didn't make much sense to keep it going. I will always feel the proper ending for FiM would have been Twilight's ascension. It only made sense for that to be the ending of the show. She reaching the biggest goal she could ever aspire to, closing a cicle and stsrting a new one. Seasons 4 to 9 were just lingering to let the show go. Filler after filler. Not that I complain about Glim Glam and later on Trixie's return and addition as a recurrent character. That felt good and kind of what should have been before the end of the show. Trixie always seemed to be a good character to reform and become part of the support cast. Neither did I ever think I'd watch the series finale on my own. But still, I wonder what could have been if they had added more adventuring and character development for twilight and her friends instead of going heavy on slice of life with her role as a princess. I totally miss the early fandom days. Everything was new and magic. Was hard to believe there were aspiring musicians making pony themed music. Was incredible. And browsing equestria daily and equestria gaming was a thing I loved doing each night after college while skyping my (now) ex. Each little news was a big wow. And waiting for the top best pony videos of each month to catch up was really cool. JHaller had an I-dunno-what that made the thing easy to enjoy. Littleshyfim just can't make the cut for me.
Alot would share that sentament, from what I have seen. Even I was unsure at some point about if it would continue. The ascension Twilight got looked like a book end, at least for what most shows that focus more on kids would do. But clearly much more was planned beyond that, just a lack of direction held it back from being a full on banger of a show. But through it all, I personally enjoyed alot of it. I have some opinions on what can be improved on, as any fan would. But that doesn't change what good the show has done.
Just wanted to add my two cents here: having written fanfiction in the past that incorporated Slayers, Samurai Pizza Cats, Tenchi Muyo and Ranma 1/2 (among others; I've down a few MSTings in the distant past, too), it's been my direct experience that having a series be over for years doesn't in any way stop the tides of fan works. Slow them down, maybe, but never stop as long as that drive exists. ... Now then, as for the reason I'm here: our oldest cat Clover's getting a bit senile and doing her business where she isn't supposed to. Last night my mom asked me to head down to the laundry room and bring up a dishpan, presumably for use as a replacement bed for the cat. So I go downstairs (reluctantly) and get the dishpan down out of a cupboard... and I recoil and panic because the blasted thing was full of spiders, including at least one recluse, and I dropped it immediately. I thought maybe they were dead, but I was too afraid to look. If anything, I was reduced to hysterical laughter at just the thought of dealing with them. It took me a half hour to recover once I was back upstairs, and as a result I'm operating on five and a half hours of sleep and a headache. So if you're wondering what my latest status update is about, here it is. I HATE SPIDERS.
I hate spiders, but usually I shrug the fear off and smite them with all the might of my shoes or any plank I can put hoof onto. Or just spray them either with insecticide or even soapy water.
