So um, I kinda want to talk about a LGBT-related problem I've been having. That is, if its okay and all. After I came out of the closet to my friends and... pretty much everyone, I've started to receive a lot of hate, even from my own family and friends. I just feel so, just, worthless. I dunno why. I really let what others say get to me I guess. Its just, what have I done wrong to deserve such hate? I'm just being me, right? Why should I feel bad about it? But its made me feel bad about it. I honestly feel like I'm a bad person for upsetting them. Maybe I just shouldn't have told anyone. I thought telling people would make it easier... but instead everyone just seems to hate me now or at least view me with feelings of disgust and contempt with the exception of a few very close friends (and my boyfriend, obviously). I just... wanted to share this. I'm sorry.
Hey you need to get it out sometime or other, the thing is you can not let people get to you. It is your life after all follow what your soul tells you to follow and let no one else get in your way. This is a little off subject, but I shall never let another person try and get the better of me, none shall tell me what is wrong and what is right, for that is for me to decide. For how can one not learn from his or her mistakes if others try and tell them that their views are their own and that mine belong to me. sorry about that got a little carried away there hehe. But I will uphold my honor to those that need it if ever you need to talk to somepony on this site talk to them all for there are doubtless some here that share the same thing as you do, but only they know. not sure if any of this helps I do my best if I can not answer go to another I will not mind. Remember I am always in the shadows making sure that those who can not stand up for themselves are protected no matter the cost. "Your honor is your life, let none dispute it!"
maybe they just got shocked and with time they may appologize to you, you couldnt keep hiding it forever, im trying to but its another story, you are worth and a proof of that is your boyfriend that is there for you. just dont let what people think bring you down ^_^
Haters gun hate, so don't get yourself down. Just laugh at the ghosties and whatnot. You may look INSANE, but I never had problems from an apparent lack of sanity.
One of my closest friends is gay. When he cam out of the closet, my friends were thoroughly shocked, but still accepted it, and were completely fine about it. His image did not change at all for me. He's still the same funny kid who loves Star Trek. In this time and age, if we can tolerate many things, gotten a step closer to being less judgmental of people by race, why is it the fact of someone's sexuality that immediately changes the situation? It's not right. People's views change just because of his/her sexuality, and it is just ridiculous. What changed? They are still the same person. Nothing changed. Just the fact that we can't imagine people being different. It's engrossed in our society. Difference = Bad. We've molded everything to be the same. Just look at America in the 50's. The dream was to have a country of clones. It's true. No one can accept the fact it's NORMAL to be different, as insane as it sounds. Ignore the hate. You're the one being strong for admitting without hesitation. In the words of Skylar Grey, "As I drown in my regrets, I can’t take back the words I never said". If no one ever knew, it's about as bad as not telling anyone, not having people know a side of you they should know. You've also got me thinking. Why should I hide I'm a brony? Will it make a difference in who I am? Why am I hiding it? I say, I've got it all wrong, and I've never thought about it like that.
I never realized how bad this was. I'm Protestant, so I'm basically the polar opposite of what Catholics believe, to put it very, very lightly. In case any of you didn't know, Catholics and Protestants fought wars against each other. That's how bad tensions were. Anyways, on topic, the Catholic Faith is extremely strict about Gay Marriage; it believes that it in and of itself is a sin, and a damned large one at that. If your parents ever kick you out, try to find someone that you know will actually take care of you. Hell, I wouldn't mind taking you in myself if I didn't live ~3,000 miles away. Let us know if anything happens; the last thing we need are fellow members of this forum being hurt mentally or physically. @ePONYmous That was incredibly long; and I read every word of it. I share your views of Gay Marriage. If a man and another man love each other, nothing should bar them from their love. They shouldn't be persecuted for being gay, nor should they be denied happiness because of a crappy state/religious law. That's where New York is doing something right. For once... Anyways, here's my story. I was... around 17. I had just finished High School and was thinking about which college I should go to. After figuring out I want to go to Miami, I go to one of the college centers. Now, when I got there, everything was fine and dandy until I actually got up there to speak. Almost as soon as I spoke, the woman at the counter said "We don't serve gays here." I wondered why she even said that, because I was just about as straight as you can get. I inquired more and more about the situation until the lady barred me from asking anymore questions. And finally, I ask her one last question; "What makes you think I'm gay?" And you know what she says? "Your voice." And that is why I refused to talk on vent. I'm scared of my own voice now, because I'm afraid of what people will think of me when I speak. Needless to say, I got a manager and I was given the papers and yada yada, and here I am. When I went back to turn the papers in, the lady wasn't there. I hope she was fired.
Thanks for all the responses (not gonna quote em all, heh). Again, its great that none of you are judgmental like everyone else I know. Your kind words really uplift me ^^. All of the pony sites I've been to are just so friendly... Also, Saikyo, I'm sorry to hear about that. No one should judge you, particularly over something as stupid as your voice! I'm sure you have a wonderful, beautiful voice (certainly better than mine, heh).
i wish someday i can come out as you did, i know things wont go well when i do it, mainly because of my father but im sure someday i will be able to do it, because its hard to keep somthing like that to myself, and maybe it becomes easiyer to find someone... ^_^
...wait, why feel bad for upsetting the haters? I just had to ask that first. Nobody should treat you this way, ever... people like that's opinions, truthfully should not matter. No need to feel sorry about this, the ones who would judge someone over this are the ones who should say sorry.
I live in Texas. The tolerance level is like -8 here. And it's so awkward because my dad expects so much from me, with my little sister clearly not living up to expectations, and the fact that I'm one of the 3 remaining grandkids (the only one of these that lives around my grandparents) that haven't screwed up in the eyes of my certified to be a preacher grandfather and my super-republican grandmother. Not to mention the fact that my roommate/best friend is SUPER homophobic (I've told him numerous times about how stupid he is over the subject) This is really difficult, I WANT to be honest with everyone but it's clear that I'd be screwed in the way of family if it were to ever come out, and at the moment I kinda have to rely on my family for living and stuff like that. /stereotypicalinclosetproblems
I wish I knew how to help you man. I'm terrible with coming out problems. Just know that you have my support, bro. Coming out is a very brave thing to do, I know this from personal experience. Took me months to work up the courage, and I still have to work up the courage every day to show myself at school and keep my head up high and be proud of who I am.
Mmm... Me too I don't know how to help you Leafy, 'cause I have this problem too. All of my friends now that I'm bi, except one who's homophobic... Sometimes, I'm ready to tell it to my parents, but I never know how, so I always ask somthing else... I think that's not a problem for my parents, I think they suppose it since a long time, but we never really speak about that, so I don't really know what they're thinking about this.
Coming out is up to you. It's not a requirement that you tell everyone. For example, your roommate doesn't have to know if you don't want him to. I don't think it needs to be a relevant subject to a person if they don't want it to be.
This is a great mentality to have. You've got to believe in WHO you are, not WHAT you are. Agreed. Texas is one of the worst states to be Gay/Lesbian in. It's like Texas is hardwired with Homophobes and Demonizations of them. Good thing I'm not one of them. I'd hate to be one of those nutjobs who believe that being Gay is wrong and that we should be made fun of for it. I'm straight. I'm straighter than straight could be. But being gay is NOT wrong, and being bisexual isn't wrong either. Anyone who assumes so is a dumb:derpe: who really needs to think about who THEY are. It disgusts me.
I'm straight too, but I do not care what you are, because you are who you are and no one but you can change that!!! @Leafy- I live in south Texas, but my point is that their are most likely people around that share the same situation to a certain degree. All I can say is to try and reach out to them and gain their friendship, not to mention you have all of us here on the website!!!!
No need to apologize - that's what this thread, and the rest of us are here for - to listen and help with problems, if we can. The only thing I can say about what's happened to you is this: People get an idea of what other people are like in their heads, and it doesn't leave. They all pictured you in a certain way, so when you rocked their world and revealed the true you, they were quite shocked and awed. People don't like it when their world changes - heck, people hate change, even though it's the one certainty in life! I don't know how long ago you shared this with them, but give them a bit of time. You're real friends will come back to you. As for the family - well, I've never been able to figure out family. They've been forming ideas about you since the day you were born, and some cannot accept that you're different from what they pictured all those years ago. Sadly, some people - family and friends - won't accept you, no matter what. Once you're sure who those people are, you've got to let them go. Sometimes, letting them go helps, and they'll come back, especially family. Just remember, you'll always make more friends.
Yeah, it's hard to tell someones opinion on issues like this without, well, asking, and that can be...risky. I could never tell my parents' opinion on stuff like this until I started homeschool and saw them (or at least my mom) more often. For example, yesterday, mom was genuinely confused by all the haters down in America being all up in arms over Chaz Bono being on Dancing with the Stars [size=-2]one of mom's favourite shows and okay maybe I kind of enjoy it a little too but that is beside the point[/size] and dad simply said something along the lines of "because they're idiots". Actually, that's his response to a lot of things like homophobia/racism/etc. I love my parents. <3
Being frankly honest, I could be gay, I could be straight. I'm battling to discover myself for who I really am. Some days I prefer men, some days women. A lot of people would just say "Well, it's easy, you're bi." But right now, i'd prefer to remain asexual (i.e. not dependant on relationships or sex) until my head and my heart is in the right place, and I can be sure that any relationship I get into is because of love, and not just using the other person to experiment and test my sexuality. As far as parents go, I once told my mother I was bisexual. She was honest with me, I'll give her that much, She said "I'd prefer it if you wasn't, but if you're happy, that's fine." My father said that any male who touches another male should have his *squee!* cut off. So yeah, my dad's a prick and as long as I'm living in this place, I can't ever express who I really am regardless of whether or not I find out who I am. Which is a large part of why I decided to remain asexual. If I can't be in a relationship that makes me happy, I'm not going to be in any relationship.
Hahaha, I'd like to see him try and cut off mine! > I don't really get why people would even say something like that- I mean, it's not it's inconsensual, both parties are perfectly happy with it. Maybe he just has an overbearing "male pride" thing, which I find uncannily silly. Also, you don't need to say you can't express yourself for who you are- if my father was like that, I probably would be trying to irritate him and make him hate me. And it would be fun. Of course, I'm weird. Sometimes the bad kind of weird. Hopefully you find yourself in a good relationship... And hopefully I do too :S Living in a ridiculously tiny community, being gay kinda sucks. I wouldn't want to be straight, but I wish that I had some chance at love before I graduate high school.
>Of course, I'm weird. Sometimes the bad kind of weird. I think that nopony here is truly normal... in this thread, forum, radio, and all of the things.
