Serious talk, so long as I can be heavily intoxicated. Being pushed out of a plane naked, or being challenged to a surprise duel?
Being challenged to a Surpise Duel! I bet I can surprise better than the other guy. Soundwave or Shockwave
Snuggles; to my mind they're like cuddles but cosier. Moderate bike crash or horrific roller-blading accident?
Either can be as bad as each other, but I'll go with moderate bike crash Having no crush for Valentines Day or no Christmas
No crush for valentine's; that's my default anyway. Being struck dumb, or losing eight fingers? (any fingers, inc. thumbs)
Dumb. I can't sing anyway but if I lost my fingers... NOOOO!! Jean Claude Van Damme or Steven Segal for worst actor?
Well... neat drinks. Drinks can't get more awesome or better than random neat drinks. A my little pony blanket with the mane 6 cast or 10 free amiibos from the Wii U selection?
Mole Police; 'cause you can burn the land and boil the sea, but you can't take the sky from me! A bunch of fireworks, or a lifetime supply of multi-coloured sparklers?
Well, the pen is mightier than the sword, but the pencil works in space; and there aren't any swords in space, so it has to be the Pencil. A Loader suit from Aliens, or a Big Daddy suit from Bioshock?
Invisibility; there are some things I don't wanna see. Being attacked by a very elderly but very persistent Samurai, or being chased down by an extremely angry but extremely inexperienced learner driver?