Insomnia is Annoying!!!

So, if ya haven't guess, this blog post is about insomnia. I guess I'm going to also include other things that are annoying that keep me awake but aren't necessarily related to insomnia.

To start, I don't sleep very often.. I normally try sleeping for a couple hours every other day, but doesn't always happen. I know it's not healthy and not right in anyway, but sometimes I use medication to sleep if I go too long without being able to fall asleep by normal means... I was given the idea of Valerian tea as a substitute, but I haven't had the chance to try that yet.

(If ya want to know my big reason for being unable to sleep, I put in a spoiler. I think it's more important to discuss ways to help with insomnia than discuss my causes for insomnia, so a spoiler seemed appropriate for this)

Spoiler: My reason plus one of my stupid dreams

Okays, I have had insomnia randomly throughout my life.. It normally happens after a stressful even and goes on for a while afterwards. In this case, it hasn't really let up.. The event that cause it this time was a few months ago after my only close friends died in a wreck. I was more over irritated that they left without me, but at the same time I was kinda happy as they no longer have to suffer in this world that caused them so much pain.. I still somewhat believe in the world, but those two had given up hope and basically lived only for our group. Now that they're gone, I find myself completely alone.

It also doesn't help that I'm afraid of my own dreams.. My mind seems to like to question my own beliefs/morals and then tear them to shreds.. The most recent dream was about my vow never to kill.. The dream started by showing a memory of when my friends and I made the vow and also made an oath not to split apart.. (We did this when we were children) After the memory stopped replaying in my mind, we suddenly had changed back to our current ages. They asked if they wanted me to go to a party. I said no as I had work to do (I did have some work, but more over I was trying to get out of going). They disappear into thin air and somehow I wound up in my room. Suddenly I hear a knock on the door and I go in to answer it.. A man dressed completely in black wearing a mask appears and says "Son, I'm sorry, they didn't make it" and then suddenly I'm at the wreck and see what remains of the accident..

Everything starts fading into black until I feel like I'm falling into the darkness. Two skeletons appear and begin screaming "Where were you? You promised! Why weren't you there? You could of saved us, but you killed us! Killed us! Do our feelings mean nothing to you? You are monster and will perish for your actions against us!" Suddenly there's fire everywhere and I hear random bursts of screams like die coward; you will burn for this; we trusted you; and monster. A weird sort of spear like thing appears from the darkness, stops moving for a sec, and then pierces my chest and the dream ends..

I know it's only a dream, but deep down I know parts of it are true.. I don't know if my mind is telling me I'm not taking enough responsibility for what has happened or if it is simply my guilt speaking to me in a dream.. What I do know is that I wake up worse than when I fell asleep and that it has been keeping me awake purely out of fear.. I'm such a coward.. I'm still trying to find methods of sleeping without having to dream, but haven't really found anything I can afford..

If you don't mind helping me out, could you leave a way of dealing with insomnia in a comment? I'd really appreciate that!
(I can't say I could necessarily return the favor, but I would really respect you for your suggestions! Thanks in advance!)

Okay, now for the fun part, listing the annoying things that keep me awake but aren't necessarily linked to my insomnia!

1. The random crazies that run around banging on every door in the apartment building trying to get points and not get caught

2. The guys next door who get drunk and party after every football game and seem to find a reason to yell about everything

3. Kids outside who like to set off every car alarm possible and then flee.

4. Motorcyclists that do tricks and donuts outside trying to get attention

5. The one little child who cries a bunch because he can't seem to get his parents to give him attention otherwise

I think I'll stop there as the list could go on forever, these are just the big ones that sort of irritate me. I'll probably adjust to them sometime, I'm just not used to it. Being a first year university student has its ups and downs I guess. Thanks for reading this. If you actually managed to stay awake, you get my applause! Have a good day/night!